Imagine you are out and about, enjoying your day. Now, imagine if someone comes up to you and starts doing something you don’t like.. let’s say you are talking with a friend, and they come in and force themselves into the conversation. Neither you nor the friend desire this, so what do you do? After asking the person to leave, or stressing that you don’t wish to talk to them, they may leave, or they might continue to annoy you. What might you eventually do? At a point, simply leave and, presuming they don’t follow, the situation is resolved (if they do, it becomes another issue, but you get the point being established here, I think).
On the internet, you can’t do this. You can’t really leave the same area as someone, without leaving the service entirely that person is on: It’s much like grade school, being forced into the same class with the same people, regardless of your desires – there is really little you can do about the entire situation. This is even worse online though, as without leaving social media on a whole, you cannot really escape such people. If you wish to be social by sharing an opinion of some kind, you will inevitably run into someone who wants to cause an issue.
What can you do, then? Simple. Block them. It sounds obvious, and it is, but for some reason, it’s seen as one of the worst, most pathetic things you can do. The moment you do it, inevitably, the next post from the person, be it on their main account or some secondary one, will inevitably be them calling you out for blocking them. The blocked person will often claim this as victory, that the person doing the blocking is some kind of weak person for it.
That is hardly the case.
In talking with friends, and in my personal experience, the reason for them blocking someone is simple, and should be obvious: they no longer wish contact with the person in question. That’s it. Be it the annoyance of what is being said, the annoyance of notifications, or any reason why someone wouldn’t want contact, that’s all it is.
It’s the most blunt way of saying “I’m tired of you.” You would think this would be understood, but no, as I said earlier it is often taken as some kind of defeat on the blockers part. How so? How does the other person being tired of your inane ramblings mean you have won whatever argument was to be had? In this regard I can only speak from my personal experiences, but when I conduct a block on someone, I have carried on conversation as far as I wish to: At that point we have either come to a consensus, or the other party has fallen into troll behavours, and I do not bother with discussion past that point.
Now, if someone is just being comical, and there is no harm, I’ll roll with it: if you are just being stupid, I can have fun with it with you. If you come on, let’s say, a perfectly passive comment, or you wish to debate me on an opinion I have, that’s fine too. My problem comes when you wish to argue beyond normal means, when you take troll tactics to keep the conversation going. This often, again, includes claiming victory over arbitrary reasons, such as me stating I am done with the conversation.
No, you haven’t won anything. Just like I said before, you have simply annoyed me to the point where I no longer value discourse with you. What does that mean? It means, in simple terms, you have shown to be too stupid to converse with, and are not worth my time.
That’s really what it boils down to, my time is more valuable than conversation with you. You’ve won nothing; if you had won whatever debate was being had, I would have said “you are correct, my bad” and moved on with life. However, when you are, let’s say, arguing against one of my articles here on Xadara, having clearly not read the article, let alone acknowledged where I might say in it that I do not wish to discuss the subject, at that point, you have automatically shown you are not even worth the time it would take to tell you that you didn’t read the article.
I’m not even sorry about this, not that I am sorry about anything I say or do: It simply amazes me that people don’t get this. You are blocked for a reason. No one wants to talk to you. Get over it. If I were annoying you, would you not do the same? I don’t go out seeking this kind of negative discussion; it comes to me, and when it does, I have every right to end conversation with anyone at any time, as do you. If you don’t want to hear from me, go ahead and block me. That simple. It works. Do I whine and say I “won” when someone blocks me? Hell no. I simply shrug and think “oh, well, okay” and go on with my life.
Lastly, I wanted to address a criticism of this that I know someone will think about. Isn’t this censorship?
No. Not by my judgement of such. I don’t block people for simply disagreeing. I block people for the methods in which they disagree. If you wish to discuss, in a calm, proper way, why you disagree with my opinion, that is fine. That is indeed welcome. However, if you come at the subject with the same kind of angst I would expect from a 14 year old, then we have a problem. If you use poor logic to come to your conclusion, or contradict yourself, I will call you out on it. If you continue to resort to childish actions, like claiming you “won” when someone doesn’t wish to discuss something, then don’t be surprised when you are blocked. I don’t want to deal with such; it’s a waste of time for everyone.
Why such a big issue over someone not wanting to hear someone’s stupidity? Nothing entitles you to anyone paying attention to what you have to say, and when you have crossed the line with someone, such an action is more than welcome. Hell, I have been pre-emptively blocked by one particular twitter user because of who I personally follow on Twitter, and that’s fine! While I think he is censoring, as I have not said anything against him directly on Twitter, I still fully support his ability to block anyone he does not wish communication with.
It’s not what you say, it’s how you say it. That simple. If you come at someone like an overgrown child, talking to them in a way they do not wish to be addressed, they have every right to end communication with you. You aren’t special. No one is.
If you get blocked, then there is a good reason, and it isn’t because you won the discussion (like every conversation is some debate, anyway); no, it’s because you rendered yourself undesirable to communicate with. That simple.
Great article, I too actually like discussions even if they think totally different but sadly I have ran into idiots a lot as well. I also have a tendency to block people that don’t talk to others (like YouTube spammers). I’m too lazy to sort my followers though.